My books are an exploration of Love and Sex and how they come together. I wrote them in response to a lot of the prevailing toxic tropes in Romance and mainstream stories that I believe have shaped how we approach relationships and the unhealthy expectations we create around them. What I learned over the course of writing these books is that when we can embrace our sexuality and come into that personal power it affords us, our relationships can be more than we ever thought possible.
A heaux is someone whose sexual power is so firmly embedded in their being that it is expressed in all they do, say and think. It does not mean that they are sex obsessed or preoccupied. Rather, they acknowledge that to be in their power means owning their sexual identity and not hiding it away out of shame or guilt. We’re not meant to compartmentalise who we are or make ourselves palatable depending on the audience of the day. In the end, who we are is all we are. No exceptions.
Liz Hayes
Since 2014, Elizabeth has written nine novellas in her Gilded Flower Trilogies, as well as five standalone contemporary romance novels in her spin-off Wildflowers Series. A mother of two children, as well as a spiritual advisor and teacher, she was inspired to write these female-driven and inclusive stories to give the next generation more positive views of love and sex. Elizabeth’s goal is to continue to publish stories that highlight women’s strengths in all areas of their lives and that serve as positive examples of what elevated love relationships and sex can do for everyone—even men. Moreover, as a diverse female, she feels passionate about bringing minority voices to the pages of contemporary Romance.
Elizabeth is also the co-host of Karma’s my Bitch podcast, that explores how taking a spiritual perspective to life issues including relationships, sex and dating can heal how we approach life. In addition to being an author and podcaster, she is also a professional expat who has moved across four continents over a span of seventeen years.
This is a digital rendering of a nude of mine done by @lord_kpuri. I used it to come out as queer on my personal page. It, my like my interview with you, is a type of disrobing. I’m revealing myself, as I am or as I see myself, to the world. Take me or leave me. It’s really that simple. (Click on website below to see this picture.)
A heaux is any particular individual who, while understanding and accepting all the consequences, engages in a sexual lifestyle that deviates from the ‘patriarchal, cis-hetero, white supremacist seeped evangelical cultural normative’ that constitutes today’s society. For me, the emphasis is on the individual who understands the consequences and accepts them which would make the “trauma ho” ineligible.
Aryam Marafi is a 21 year old Kuwaiti medical student and activist. She is an abuse survivor who advocates for survivors of abuse and raises awareness of safeguarding issues in Kuwait. She is currently seeking asylum in the UK.
Instagram: @aryammarafi
This is a drawing I made that I feel represents my view of my body. It expresses my frustration that my body and what I do with my body is always up for debate and my choices are never respected. The hands creeping in from the corners represent my experiences with sexual abuse and people feeling entitled to use my body as they please without my consent. The shadow depicts my experiences with dissociation. I wanted to express how overwhelming and lonely it feels to constantly be controlled and used. The flowers signify the beauty into the world that can be easy to overlook when we suffer from abuse and trauma.
A heaux is someone who makes their own choices about their body and enjoys their body even when others try to take that joy away.
Externally, I have presented as straight, cis-gender, and accommodating. I have seemed to follow purity culture even though I didn’t completely. But those close to me know better and that’s something I will always appreciate, both about me and about them. I think the whole bigger on the inside thing is also a good description of the love I have cultivated individually for my body in a fatphobic culture.
“A heaux is someone who says no to oppressive control of their sexuality, body image, and sexual relationships.”
~Emily~
My sexuality in a picture is a tardis – it’s bigger on the inside.
Emily Hedrick is a religious trauma-informed spirituality coach. She is passionate about creating new structures, stories, and rituals with creative, down-to-earth, spiritually-minded humans. Committed to naming the ways rigid religion can cause harm, Emily is clearing space for human spirituality that resists exploitation from charismatic gurus and systemic violence present in many established religious institutions. She believes in the power of metaphor, poetry, and community and can’t wait to welcome people to a world where we can be fully ourselves while embracing meaning, connection, and transcendence in everyday life.
You can find her @goingodless on insta, Going Godless on Facebook and on her website goingodless.com
~To be a heaux is to engage in consensual sex, be kind your yourself and partner(s), creative, fully embodied, unapologetic, powerful, and free.~ Jenaya
I grew up as a Baptist missionary kid in South America and attended a notorious right wing Bible college. After seven children and 32 years, I pulled the rip cord in pursuit of my own happiness and integrity.
When I left my marriage in May of 2021, I became homeless virtually overnight. The judge signed my divorce papers unexpectedly with no hearing the same day I presented them while I had been counting on a 6-week or so waiting period. My Uber-holy Christian ex gave me the boot because “we’re no longer married..so to protect my testimony, you must leave.”
I walked out the door with a suitcase and no plan. A kind man I only knew from singing karaoke online, who was in upstate New York, said I could come stay a while. So I did. Y’all, it was like the parable of the widow’s mite. The poor guy had so little to offer, he was an alcoholic with major PTSD and had been abused by a girl as a child. His living conditions weren’t fabulous. But he gave me what he had: sex. Great, connected, lavish, beautiful, hot sex. Lots of it. He healed wounds in me I had never acknowledged and introduced me to erogenous zones I didn’t know existed. Trauma going back 30 years at least to my honeymoon…
A heaux is anyone who is practicing autonomy over their body and sexual desires or lack thereof.
~Sarah~
For those interested in learning more about the differences in various fundamentalist organizations and viewpoints, check out this YouTube link.
Follow, support, send love to @theviolentbareitaway.
“Because everything I was told was taboo, I just want to explore more.” ~Sarah~
Hi! My name is Fran, a family man in his 40s from the South of Spain who frequently travels. In this podcast I spit it all out for when it comes to erotic photoshoots which I love to do as I’m a hobby photographer. I love helping women realize their dream of being nude in front of a camera, and making them comfortable with it, otherwise it’s no fun!
A heaux is nothing else than a woman craving for love. Erupting her lava into another soul in the form of sex, the heaux is there to be taken or to get burned but never to be ignored. Heaux is generosity and modesty. The heauxlycoitus search until they find, until they settle, but only while they satisfied, that’s when they are truly liberated, just as love starts hurting.
The picture above is from my muse. I am booked for the foreseeable future … that’s how it goes!
To the Spanish-speaking women out there, the “desenfrenadas” or “desenfrenadascoitales” we salute them warningly hoping for you to share your journey with us. Un fuerte abrazo. Nos vemos pronto. Be a heaux!
______
To read my reflection on my nude photo shoot with Fran, click here! Fran took stunning photos of every square inch of my canvas. Y’all not about to see ALL of the photos, but here are a couple that are internet-appropriate.
I’m a philosopher, author, and podcaster in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA. I mostly work on disagreement, public discussion, trust, expertise, politics, and religion. My podcast is called “A Pastor and a Philosopher Walk into a Bar” and can be found wherever you get podcasts. You can find me on Twitter @robertkwhitaker and at my website: robertkwhitaker.com
This photo nicely captures the contradictory messages evangelicalism sends, especially to youth, about sex. “God made it, so it’s good and you should want it, but also it’s bad to want it too much or too soon or with almost any actual person, so definitely don’t actually do it or think about it.”
“A heaux (I’ve just learned) is a person wresting control of their sexuality back from institutions that are oppressive and/or untrustworthy. In that sense, long live heauxdom!”
I’m Cat Delmar and I write about my experiences as a first-generation Jamaican-American, from leaving Christianity/Seventh-day Adventism and healing my intimacy disorder to my journey into earth-based spirituality and discovering and embracing an edifying type of sexuality.
I struggled with sex and love addiction for years due to purity culture and narcissistic abuse. Then I had a spiritual awakening and came out of my “trauma ho phase.” Now I’m a free-spirited, twerking mermaid heaux for myself and my fiancé, trying to be a good veterinarian while I juggle writing a book about my journey out of addiction as well as finding ways to help people on their journey!
Let’s connect, share, and elevate! I’m on Instagram and Twitter using the handle @catmangrove.
~A heaux is liberated from societal conditioning and follows her own personal moral code. She has agency in all of her affairs and she has harnessed and mastered the magical craft that is seduction. A heaux does not simply give or receive pleasure; she is the walking and breathing embodiment of pleasure. A heaux lives confidently, peacefully, boldly, and mindfully because she intimately knows and honors all the longings of her mind, body, and soul.~
A heaux is liberated from societal conditioning and follows her own personal moral code. She has agency in all of her affairs and she has harnessed and mastered the magical craft that is seduction. A heaux does not simply give or receive pleasure; she is the walking and breathing embodiment of pleasure. A heaux lives confidently, peacefully, boldly, and mindfully because she intimately knows and honors all the longings of her mind, body, and soul.
Nkem is a human-goddess hybrid who is devoted to using her highly sensitive nature as a super power to access pleasure in this lifetime, whether sensing pleasure directly or in transmuting pain into pleasure through writing, dancing, and connecting with other souls across this big-but-small world.
This photo is special in its simplicity. It honors my natural, my curves, my depth.
A heaux is a person actively involved in the pleasure they receive; a person who prioritizes pleasure; a person who takes pleasure in prioritizing pleasure.
~Nkem~
You can follow her @naturallyfree123 and read her written work at www.bynkem.co/words.
Heauxly Coitus 